First Love

FIRST LOVE

by Gwendoline Riley

 

Nominations: James Tait Black Finalist 2018, Women’s Prize Finalist 2017

 

Date Read: August 21, 2023

 

First Love is such a frustrating novel because the entire read I wanted to smack Neve upside her head and tell her to just leave. She is married to Edwyn and although I believe she loves him, they are so ill-suited for each other, their relationship can be explained as nails on a chalkboard. Actually, Neve is fine. Edwyn is like nails on a chalkboard.

 

We are privy to Neve’s background, her relationship with her father who, not shockingly, is very similar to Edwyn. He seemed to delight in other’s pain, was manipulative and violent and there was a brief allusion to molestation? An early relationship with a musician who went in and out of town at random intervals also left her wanting and was never emotionally fulfilling.

 

And then she settled on and even married, Edwyn. Edwyn is one of those guys that can turn any conversation into a criticism of you. Even his own insecurities and lacks can be turned around as if they were actually yours and not his. One mistake years ago (Neve got drunk and barfed in the bathroom), is brought up again and again and again because Edwyn is incapable of forgiving. Rather than taking care of her with love and affection, he packs her suitcase to throw her out while she’s recovering.

 

Meanwhile, Neve is constantly tiptoeing around, trying to avoid a confrontation and when she isn’t able, she tries to appease him as much as possible to deflect his anger. I kept wanting to scream that she can do so much better. That she shouldn’t have to hide her real thoughts or diminish herself in order to remain in this worthless relationship.

 

The writing is fantastic because Riley perfectly encapsulated that type of guy that I’m sure most women have come across. They really are like finding a predator in the wild. Only someone this gifted could get my blood boiling and compel me to commit cold-blooded murder against a man that doesn’t even exist.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A Gentleman In Moscow

Image
A GENTLEMAN IN MOSCOW by Amor Towles   Nominations: Dublin Longlist 2018, Goodreads Finalist 2016, Kirkus Finalist 2016   Date Read: February 24, 2017   From Kirkus Reviews:   “Sentenced to house arrest in Moscow's Metropol Hotel by a Bolshevik tribunal for writing a poem deemed to encourage revolt, Count Alexander Rostov nonetheless lives the fullest of lives, discovering the depths of his humanity.   Inside the elegant Metropol, located near the Kremlin and the Bolshoi, the Count slowly adjusts to circumstances as a "Former Person." He makes do with the attic room, to which he is banished after residing for years in a posh third-floor suite. A man of refined taste in wine, food, and literature, he strives to maintain a daily routine, exploring the nooks and crannies of the hotel, bonding with staff, accepting the advances of attractive women, and forming what proves to be a deeply meaningful relationship with a spirited young girl, Nina. "We are bound to find comfo
Read more

An Island

Image
AN ISLAND by Karen Jennings   Nomination: Booker Longlist 2021   Date Read: December 10, 2022   A short but mighty novel, An Island explores the concept of home, family, identity, the impact of political upheaval and the immigrant experience, when one’s suffering is so intense they move from one shitty country to the next. Samuel has finally found a peaceful home on an island somewhere off the coast of Africa. He was hired as a lighthouse keeper and after a tumultuous life, most of which was spent in prison as a political prisoner, he has carved out a life for himself on this island, enjoying a tranquil existence that basks in the quiet tasks of daily living.   Only after exploring Samuel’s life does the reader understand why such an isolated, spare and lonely existence satisfy him, with no desire to escape but only to grow deeper roots. His life witnessed the end of the British occupation, the installation of a brutal dictator and yet another dictator after the first was poisoned. Sam
Read more

The Changeling

Image
THE CHANGELING by Victor LaValle   Nominations: Dublin Longlist 2019, LA Times Finalist 2017, PEN/Jean Stein Finalist 2018   Date Read: July 21, 2024   From Kirkus Reviews: “A  tragedy thrusts a mourning father into peculiar, otherworldly corners of New York City. When Apollo and Emma have their baby, Brian, it feels like both reward and challenge for the new dad. Apollo, the son of a single mother, had been scraping by as a bookseller who hunts estate and garage sales for rare first editions, so even the unusual circumstance of Brian's birth (in a stalled subway train) seems like a blessing, as does the way Apollo stumbles across a first edition of  To Kill a Mockingbird  (inscribed by Harper Lee to Truman Capote, no less) shortly after. But after some young-parent squabbles and inexplicable images on their smartphones foreshadow trouble, the story turns nightmarish: Apollo finds himself tied up and beaten by Emma, then forced to listen to the sounds of Brian’s murder. LaValle has
Read more